Hi all! For those of you who are reading my blog for the first time, I’m just a young wife sharing some thoughts and experiences on topics pertaining to marriage. I don’t pretend to have it all figured out – I have SO much to learn, and will forever be yearning to grow in wisdom and selflessness. I am simply using this platform to record some of my journey as a wife, and to share a few things with any and all who care to visit Wall Wife Life. Perhaps my blogs will spark an idea, act as a reminder, or simply entertain you a bit… Whichever is the case, thank you for reading! I hope you enjoy my thoughts on 12 simple ways to love your husband.
1. Initiate in the Bedroom
I admit that this was not something I had thought much about before getting married. I guess I just kind of figured initiation in our sex life would be mostly natural, and not require so much of a personal choice. About a month into our marriage, however, my husband shared how much it would mean to him if I made the effort to initiate in the bedroom more often. I was irritated and offended to hear this at first… Making myself the victim, I immediately thought things like, “How am I disappointing him in this area already?! I guess things weren’t going as amazingly as I thought,” and blah, blah, blah.
After entertaining these insecurities for a few moments, I realized how genuine my husband was when he said these things to me. He wasn’t attacking or criticizing me. Rather, he was being honest and vulnerable – communicating a way that he would feel loved by me. This conversation was a pivotal moment in our marriage and in our sex life.
Initiating in the bedroom lets your hubby know that you value this area of your marriage, and that you see it as a priority! It shows him that you desire him and want to maintain a healthy, intimate connection in this way. For all of you wives out there: maybe use some of the gifts from your bachelorette party that you never seem to pull out and wear anymore… He will be thrilled!
2. Cook Yummy Meals for Him (Or TRY to, at least…)
Whether it’s a new recipe you decided to surprise him with, or a simple sandwich you made him for lunch, a man feels crazy loved when you hand him a plate adorned with food. I’m sure you have all heard the silly saying, “food is the way to a man’s heart!” This thought has always made me chuckle, and being married has most definitely revealed the truth behind it! Without a doubt, food is one of Mikey’s love languages; it’s just one of the many ways I can remind him that he is loved by me.
3. Really Listen When He Talks
It is sometimes easy to be distracted during conversation with my husband – even by homework and cleaning! Those things are good and important, but my man is far more important. Putting my phone, computer, or whatever else away when he is sharing about his day is a very simple, meaningful way to be loving.
4. Thank Him for Things He Does for You
An attitude of gratitude is powerful, especially when it comes to your spouse. Being the kind of person who is often making “to-do” lists, it’s tempting for me to nag my husband when I see that things need to be done. I’ve found it effective to give friendly reminders at times…but nothing is more encouraging than genuinely expressing gratitude for the ways in which he serves me.
5. Smile When He Walks in the Door!
Showing your man that you’re excited to see him every single day is such a simple and meaningful thing. As mentioned in my previous blog post, it’s the little things!
6. Show Affection Every Day
Everyone needs some daily lovin’ – enough said!
7. Ask Him How You Can be Praying for Him
Not only does this show him that you care about him in the moment, but it also reminds him that you care about his growth and well-being going forward. Asking how you can be praying for your husband provides an opportunity for him to share some specificities pertaining to his struggles, fears, etc. It’s a way to align your hearts and minds, and to remind you both of the encouragers and prayer-warriors you can be for one another.
8. Tell Him You Love Him Often
I really believe that you can never say “I love you” too much. Love is a choice, and saying that you love him, out loud and often, verbalizes that daily choice. It just never gets old!
9. Give Him Back Massages
After a long day at work, there are few things that Mikey loves more than a back massage. It relieves his stress, makes him feel crazy loved, and let’s face it… it’s a great exercise for the thumbs.
10. Tell Him He’s Handsome
This is another simple one – yet it is so important! Just as you long to be beautiful in the eyes of your man, he wants to know that you think he’s looking fine. Don’t just think it – say it!
11. Send Him Encouraging Texts/Leave Voicemails Once in a Blue Moon
Life is busy. Between school, work, or whatever else you juggle, it can feel as though you hardly ever see your man. On an occasional lonely day apart, you can remind him of how much you love and appreciate him with that device we all use way too much! An encouraging, sincere text or voicemail will bring a smile to his face, and provide a little extra motivation for his day.
12. Tell Him You are Proud of Him
Doing so means more than you, as a woman, might know or understand. If your husband is anything like mine, he feels loved and validated through words of affirmation. Telling him that I am proud of him makes him feel loved and respected; it reminds him that I see the ways he is leading and loving me well.
Whether you can relate to any of these ideas or not, I hope you enjoyed reading this week’s post from Wall Wife Life! Stay tuned for more coming soon!